Saturdays are my favorite day, so why did this one have to be oh-so crummy? It started at the beginning of this week. My daughter started getting a fever, then a nasty cough. She wasn't too bad though until Friday. She stopped eating, playing, and then sleeping. She is a great sleeper, too, so I admit, I'm a bit spoiled. But she woke up about a half hour after I went to bed, then every half hour after that until she got to the point that she wouldn't even let me put her down. Every rattling, wheezing cough made her cry, and she was burning up. Finally, after the 2nd dose of Tylenol kicked in, she slept for about 4 hours. Thankfully, her pediatrician's office is open in the mornings on Saturdays, so needless to say, we made a visit.
The good news from the doctor is that our daughter doesn't seem to be struggling to breathe, although he was listening very carefully to the rattle in her chest. A chest x-ray may be in order on Monday. She does have an ear infection, which is actually the first one she's ever had, so I count my blessings. I really don't know how you poor mamas do it who have babies with chronic ear infections. Do you get ANY sleep??
So after I got home from the pharmacy, I tried to take a quick cat nap before heading out again in the cold rain for a hair appointment that I had to reschedule because of our impromptu doctor's appointment. I realized as I tried to nap that I am a hormonal mess. For some reason not known to any woman on this earth, my body decided to combine the PMS with the MS. I couldn't stop eating cream cheese, and I had a strong urge to scratch the eyes out of anyone who crossed my path.
Already tired and grouchy, I headed out to my hair appointment. I refuse to pay salon prices, so I go to the local cosmetology school. I spent 3 hours in a chair with sweat rolling down my back because it was insufferably hot, and, after every little slice of the scissors, the hair stylist had to get a teacher to check (which is really a good thing so that they don't do something horrible, but today it was annoying, thank you hormones). And I hate my hair cut. Hate might not be the right word. Disdain sounds better. The hair stylist actually showed me a picture of her idea of what she wanted my hair to look like, and I was all for it and excited. The problem was the picture and the do did not match whatsoever. I've always looked younger than my age, and now, I look like my age...not good. Utter disdain.
What's worse is the reaction I received from my husband when I got home. I could immediately tell he didn't like my hair. He hasn't said anything about it since I got home. I'm not even going to ask what he thinks, because I know no matter what flattering comment he would make, I would take it the wrong way.
I now realize that I should never get my hair done when I am hormonal. I am in a much worse mood, and my last hope of feeling more than just a 30-something-year-old mom is gone. Why, oh why do hormones have to exist at such extreme levels? By the way, I'm writing this as I'm eating a bowl of cookies and cream frozen yogurt with a massive amount of Oreos blanketing the top. And I will probably have dessert afterwards. Honestly, food is the only relationship I want to be involved in at this moment. Give me a hotel room by myself with a bag of chips, as many Girl Scout cookies as I can muster, and a bucket of fried chicken PLEASE! And this coming from one who prides herself on making homemade organic goods. I am definitely not myself.
I was hoping that writing this and venting would help me feel better. But honestly, I'm just more annoyed. I try to be optimistic in any given situation, so the good news is that I don't think I've given into my emotions and done or said anything today that would hurt another. So I think I'm going to call it a day and find my pillow before I do anything regrettable. Tomorrow is another day, and I thank God that He has given me one more day to try again.
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